And now Fuzzy - RIP little ones. I did the best I could.

[lizmo1221]

Oh no!! Why does the thread title say headspot is gone???

 

[victoria]

:hugs:

 

[fenshae]

I hate having to say this. It's harder now than it would've been a few days ago because I finally started to feel confident. Arrogant even.

But Headspot's gone. I don't know what happened for sure. Aspirated milk, maybe -- right at the end my hand slipped and she got some milk bubbles. Or swallowed air, maybe. She always had a tendency to do the power-sucking thing, opening her mouth up really wide and sucking, but she'd never suckle properly. She'd been like that the whole time I've had her, never being able to form a seal on the syringe. But, anyway. I finished feeding her and noticed immediately that something was wrong. She didn't resist me when I did the post-meal groom and her extremeties looked pale. She started gasping for awhile. Then she went still, and I thought she was gone....and then she pulled a zombie move just as David said, "let's go bury her now," and she gave a huge gasp again and then we both started in on a frenzied attempt at resurrection which of course didn't actually work.

Now she's definitely gone. Looking at her underbelly I see this big dark spot where the milk band would be -- looks kind of like a blood blister -- and I don't know if that's a hemmorage or what. *sigh*

Her sister's still with us so she might still beat the odds....

 

[lilspaz68]

As sad as it is, I am not surprised at all. Those little tiny beings without their mom have a huge deck of cards stacked against them. They go so quickly too, it probably wasn't anything you did at all, so don't fret about that. ((hugs))

Be free little Headspot. :heart:

 

[eagle]

I am so sorry to hear this, but as Shelagh said the odds were stacked against them. Hugs to you and your husband you both did a wonderful job.
Be free wee little Headspot.

 

[handmeafish]

At least she had someone to care for her in the end, instead of the alternative.
Praying hard for the last little one.

 

[mamarat]

I'm so sorry little Headspot is gone. :hugs:

 

[fenshae]

Aw man I totally slept straight through the alarm for the 6am feeding. *wince* Luckily our survivor doesn't seem too mad at me. Fuzzy, who I am half-jokingly calling Sojask, (it means "found infant" in my made-up rat language that I made up for the book I wrote about rats) is doing great at least. She is surprisingly mibile all of a sudden. She's half-walking, half-scooting all over the table. 12 days old today. Her eyes should start opening within the next few days And after that we might be able to try lapping some formula up from a dish. Very exciting stuff.

On a whim last night I cut a small chunk out of an old pillow case and put that over the tip of the syringe, so she'd have something to suck on, and she LOVES it. It's finally big enough for her to suck on, and it helps even out the flow so there's not so much drowning risk if the plunger misfires. Wish I'd done this sooner.

When I'm done feeding her the allotted amount she always trues to keep suckling my hand, her blanket, anything that comes close. Does that mean she's still hungry and I should keep feeding her? I'm filling the syringe double to accommodate lost food in the new delivery system (since some will invariably soak into the cloth never to be seen again) but I don't want to over-feed her. Is it even possible to over-feed her at this age? Or will she just stop sucking when she's not hungry anymore? Hrm.

Oh, and in other, disturbing news. I found a little blood on the tissue after her last poo. She was very fussy about being cleaned and squeaked every time I touched her there and it was deep red, fresh blood (not black gritty internal bleeding blood) so I'm going to guess she has a small cut or irritation around her anus. Hopefully it's that and not something serious....

 

[eagle]

I would think she will stop eating when she is full. Are her poops super hard or somewhat soft?

 

[fenshae]

No poo this feeding, but her last poo was surprisingly big and solid. I can safely say I didn't poke it for texture, though.

 

[momofmany]

Oh dear, little Headspot! :cry: :heart: You are an awesome person doing what you can, nature just sometimes has other plans. :hugs:

 

[lilspaz68]

I would feed her more if she wants it fenshae, especially at this age. :thumbup:

 

[fenshae]

She is a nursing machine. Once you can get enough of the fabric in her mouth for her to get a tight seal on it she can suck down 3ccs (well, some of that's disappearing into the fabric I'm sure) in like a minute LOL. I'll try to cannibalize some batteries out of something for the camera tonight, she is sooo big and fuzzy, she's starting to look like a real rat. The white fur is starting to come in on her chin and sides.

Also confirmed the source of the blood, she *does* have a little scab on her anus. Guessing there was a papercut or something from over-exuberant cleaning. Hopefully that doesn't give her any issues.

 

[lilspaz68]

*whew* on the scab! Cannot wait to see what she looks like now!

 

[Joanne]

I'm so sorry you lost little Headspot. You gave her the best chance you could.
I agree that you should feed the baby more if she wants it. I'm sure they must feel if they're full and stop. Glad you've got a new system worked out that Fuzzy likes.
Can't wait for pics!

 

[fenshae]

I am stunned. I can't even cry, I'm so shocked.

Fuzzy was being really fussy this morning at the 6am feeding. She wouldn't suckle. I'd put the cloth or just the catheter in her mouth and she would lose interest and just let it slip out. She kept squeaking in protest and pawing it away. After struggling through with that for awhile I decided to put her back down to bed for a couple hours and then try it again.

When I went back for her, she was unresponsive. I picked her up and she squirmed a little, made a few gasps, then went still. There was some dried blood on her anus/underside of her tail and she has the same dark blood-blister-looking thing in her belly that her sister had.

I can't believe it. I'd really gotten it into my head that the older they got, the better their chances with me would be. But I guess not. Today was exactly 1 week they'd been with me.

I'm sorry little ones. I did the best I could.

 

[crumbilina]

Awww :hugs:

I'm so so sorry

You did everything you could.

:hugs:

 

[zenia wulfe]

I am so sorry about Fuzzy and Headspot. I was rooting for them. I am happy that you made their short life good and you should be too.

 

[lilspaz68]

Awww sweetie...you all tried so hard :cry:

 

[fenshae]

I know I'm grasping at straws here, because I'm one of those people who always needs closure. But I just had a thought. Assuming their mom was in/around Wal-Mart, it doesn't seem unreasonable that she could have gotten poisoned. And if she did, it also doesn't seem unreasonable that the babies would have been poisoned and that it may have taken awhile to kick in. From what I've read, it can sometimes take days, and symptoms include excessive bruising and bloody stool/urine. Like I said, maybe grasping at straws. But judging from that dark bit in their bellies I really think something ruptured or there was some kind of internal bleeding, and while Headspot's *could* have been the result of air in the stomach or something, I know Fuzzy's couldn't be.

Grasping at straws, like I say. Maybe this is just another of those things that just happens....